22 Mar 10

1. General. I woke up at 1pm this afternoon. It was a good long sleep. Then I had lunch with my parents and I got my POSB card!!! Finally!!! I'm damn happy now. Lol. 

2. Magic, the Gathering. I did alot of catching up on the magicthegathering.com articles today. But that's all. Sigh.

3. Love and Comedy. What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter what you call him, he still won't come! 

21 Mar 10

Day Four of IAG Senior (18-21 March) coaching. 21 March

6.45am. I'm freakin pissed with my paternal grandmother. When I sat down at the dining table with my fried egg sandwich for breakfast, she asked me (translated from Chinese): "Why you go and fight?"

Can you say HUH???

I was like what the f***??? I've been coaching for at least 15 hours everyday, putting in my 100%, and she thinks I've been fighting??? What a way to start the day. Thanks alot, I'm now pissed. I just ignored her after that. As I wa leaving she asked me: "Where are you going?" I don't know about you, but sometimes I feel that's kind of a stupid question. I mean, I've been gone "fighting" for the past 3 days and you still ask me? I said I didn't know, an she didn't press the matter. Tonight or tomorrow if she asks me where I went, I'm gonna tell her I went fighting. See if that shuts her up. Don't give me flimsy excuses like she's old and forgetting things, that she doesn't realise what she's saying. Hello, I've been LIVING with her for the past 8-9 months. I know her. She is not insane, or stupid. She can banter with us and understand our jokes, even cracking some herself so don't give me these shit excuses. Even if I WAS fighting (which I'm not), whymust she bring it up first thing in the f***ing early morning???

Okay, that's it. Enough. I'm not gonna let her thoughtless comments ruin my day. No, what she says is a distraction, and what do you do with distractions? You ignore them or remove them. So that's what I shall do, I will ignore her for a few days, and remove her from mind.

4.23pm. Finally! A break! I'm so effing tired now. For the past 2 hours, I've been like, duh... And blur. I'm also a bit upset because one of my participants was not able to do the speed reading properly and one of my fellow coaches (I'm not gonna mention names) kept shouting at him, targeting him specifically, because my participant wasn't following the speed reading techniques. I can understand what the coach did. We as coaches are supposed to push the participants to their limits by pressurising them, shouting encouraging things like, "put in your 100%!!!", "go faster, push yourself!!!", "well done!!! Keep going!!!", "read in chunks!!! Pen pacing!!! Circle keywords and key ideas!!!", and "finished reading? Read again!!" That coach was shouting all those things, until my participant cried, becuase I think he (the participant) felt too pressured, too targeted. I didn't know how o handle that at the time, because I'm still just an assistant coach, and I didn't know the reason behind what the coach did. So I just left it, accepting the coach's experience, and trusting that what he was doing was necessary and okay. But I still felt a little angry and upset. Angry because I felt, maybe tha coach pushed too hard, and upset because I couldn't handle to situation the way I wanted it to be. I felt useless because I had no control.

20 Mar 10

Day Three of IAG Senior (18-21 March) coaching. 20th March.

8.09pm. F*** I couldn't put a post til now. I woke up late, like at 7.10am, because I just ignored my alarm clock. F***. I had to rush down without eating breakfast and I was 10mins late. Like I said, f***. We just had dinner and TTP before that. I don't think I did my TTP properly, but Keith said most of it, so it was okay I suppose. As long as the participants get the message. I don't wanna talk anymore.

1.38am. We had TTP and HTP today. Man I am so glad I'm not one of the participants. I love being a coach. In 6 hours time, the last day of this camp will arrive. I will wake up earlier an not be late like today. F*** man.

End of Day Three of IAG Senior (18-21 March)

19 Mar 10

Day Two of IAG Senior (18-21 March) coaching. 19th March.

6.02am. I'm up again. I literally had less than four hours of sleep. But I did have a leftover breakfast. I mean, leftover from dinner last night. Fried chicken pieces (now soft) in bread and a big cup of Fruit Juice. Yummy.

3.43pm. Very busy, very rushed. Couldn't put anything til now. We went outdoors to play Amazing Race. That was tiring but fun. My group couldn't do the swinging log because the log wasn't ready. Now Adam is training, framing the participants for BTW. I'm waiting for my job to begin. I'm a doorman, directing the coaches to their umm, well I can't say it here because this blog is public. So anyway, I got this job because I have not done BTW with a participant before. So I'm supposed to watch and learn as well. My muscles are aching, because I haven't exercised in a loooonnnngggg time. About the Angel/Mortal game. I put in a little something for my mortal but it hasn't been checked yet. Yep it's still there...

6.44pm. We just had BTW. I ears some extremely sad and some horrifying stories from Adam. I cried, because I couldn't imagine these events happening in my life. There was this girl (not in this camp) who watched her mother commit suicide. The father was an alcholic and abused the mother. She couldn't take it anymore and took the little girl's hand and they went up to the 8th floor where she said (in Chinese): "I'm sorry, I cannot take care of you anymore." and she jumped. That story just broke my heart, and my eyes started to well up with tears. And as I that's not enough, the father was there watching and you know what he said? "Go down and see if your mother is really dead." 

WHAAAAAAAATTTTTT TTTHHHHHEEEEEE FFFFFF***************?????????

How can you say that to a little girl (younger than 12 years old I think) who just watches her mother die??????? She actually went down and had to stare at the mother, who was facedown on the ground with blood pooling around her head, until the police came to take the body away. Can you say TRAUMATIZED?????

End of Day Two of IAG Senior (18-21 March)

18 Mar 10

Day One of IAG Senior (18-21 March) coaching. 18th March

5.44am. I eating a hearty breakfast of bread and apple bacon ham, 1 piece of marble cake and a big cup if soy bean milk. I plan to go to 7 Eleven to stock up on Sprite, sweets, snacks. If there's one thing I learned from the last time I coached, it's that one must keep eating. I hafta keep eating to stay awake. And trust me, staying awake and alert is the most important thing a coach needs to do.

6.56am. I'm here, and I'm the first of the coaches!!!! Mwahahaha.. They can't fine me!!!! The PD ad APD (Program Director and Assistant Program Director) agreed to fine any coach who was late at a rate of $1 per minute. Since I'm early, they should fine me negative!!! Lol. It's the start of a good day. The 7 Eleven didn't have enuogh Sprite so I took 2 H-Two-Os and a Ricola (Lemon Mint).

9.55am. We're having a breakfast break now. Til 10.30an I think. Summary of what has happened:

We had Ra-Ra to welcome the participants, and Kenneth (our PD) introduced us coaches one by one, making fun of several. Then Adam came in an started the introduction to the camp. I said the T word so I gotta pay $10 today. Damn.

12.52pm. Sitting at the back of the room where Adam Khoo is training now. We just watched the Nick video. The guy without limbs. I forgotten how to spell his surname. Anyway, chek it out at lifewithoutlimbs.org. It's damn inspiring.

4.10pm. I just got punked my my fellow coaches. Dean came up to me and said Yu Yuan was looking for me. So I dutifully went to TR3 to look for him, and then he and Cheryl called me to the back of the room. Kenneth and Jia Yu were there as well. They had formed a semicircle of chairs with Kenneth and Yu Yuan standing and the others sitting down. I was instructed to grab a chair and sit in the centre, facing Dean, so I did. Then they explained to me, they were testing out a reflex game to play with the participants later. I should have caught it there, but I guess I was excited about a reflex game. The game was Mirror, whatever Dean did, I was supposed to mirror. So he raise his right hand and I followe with my left hand, then he raised his left hand and crossed it over his right hand. I followed. Then he raise both hands in the air and as I did, Kenneth and Yu Yuan grabed my arms, the Dean lifted my shirt while Jia Yu held my legs down and Cheryl sprayed my tummy with Dettol spray. I was like so shocked and instinctively attempted to curl up into a ball. It was funny. I suppose it's some sort of initiation thing.

1.46am. Yes. I'm not kidding. It's really the next day already. I just finished bathing and now in bed, putting out this last part. This was a very good day. I love my fellow coaches. We're like one family. It's damn fun. I also love my group. All guys, 6 of them. Keith and I are coaching them. And although I'm an assistant coach, I have more coaching experience than Keith. Hmm... He is a Math Teacher at AKLC, though. We coaches are playing Angel/Mortal. And I'm an Angel to- ah, cannot say now... It's just nice to know that I'm and angel to a female. It's cool. Gonna buy some sweets and put it inside her envelope. Oh! And I need to find that Celine Dion song I'm Your Angel. Is that te title? Nevermind i'll find out tomorrow. I mean, today.

End of Day One of IAG Senior (18-21 March)

17 Mar 10

1. General. Let me begin my tirade of fat people followed by a tantrum about slow people and lastly a tirade tantrum about fat AND slow people. I meet them everyday on the train, on the lifts, pedestrian walkways, underground tunnels. Know what these places all have got in common? They're all SMALL. which means the fat people block the WHOLE WAY. It's worse when there are several of them porkers who waddle together in a straight line. Now if they did it duck style (in a vertical line), then I wouldn't mind so much. But they do it like a moving barrier!!! I mean, of the 4 ways I can get past them (over, under around, through), I can do... Oh let's see, none!!! Now slow people I can deal with, if they can move their arses to one side. Why do slow people happen to fast people? I think there should be 2 lanes per direction per sidewalk/pathway/tunnel etc etc. One for the uber slow ones and one for the light speed people. They have that on the highway, why not for pedestrians?

Now, when there are fat AND slow people. That's like walking behind a wall with a faceful of Gluteus Maximus. Google the term if you have no idea what it means or are too dense to figure out from my sentence structure.

Oh and it's the last day of work so I'm very happy. My third paycheck ever!!!

2. Magic, the Gathering. From now til Sunday I will cut out this section because I will be coaching at AKLTG from 7am-12midnight. Everyday. I will not have time to do anything about this. So, in te mean time, check out my friend Ernst's blog: 
bfg-likes-cheese.blogspot.com
He also plays Magic and I hope he will regularly update his blog.

3. Love and Comedy. I couldn't find any new funny jokes today so I found this old one.

A visitor from Holland was chatting to his American friend, jokingly explaining the colours of the Netherlands flag. He said: "Out flag symbolizes our taxes. We get red when we talk about them, white when we see them and blue after we pay them." The American replied: "Its the same for us, except we see stars too!"

From now til Sunday, my blogs will be extremely short and to the point, a summary of the day because I will be too tired to write anything else. I will do my best to write as much as possible, but it will be one big lump instead of my organized sections. I'll save time by writing whenever I can, summarising the events past for the day. You'll see what I mean tomorrow.

16 Mar 10

1. General. I found out that playing strategy turn based games and raising a zombie army/farm kills a lot of time, especially when you bring your iPod charger to work. Lol. Yeah that's what I did. The whole day.

Ms Fatimah did introduce me to Azhar, an auditor. We had lunch together with his senior, Mala, also an auditor, and I found out alot of stuff. Both of them are Indian. I learned that auditors are also financial advisors and planners. That an auditor would have to go overseas if they have an overseas client. And that an experienced auditor could have up to 10 projects running at once (Mala). It's more than I expected and I'm really glad I met them both. I now have a slightly clearer perception of what an auditor does.

2. Magic, the Gathering. Nothing happened today. I read magicthegathering.com as usual, and I picked up some interesting tips on how to decide to keep or mulligan. Like, think of what you need, not what you have. Like analysing the percentage of a card you need coming out on say, turn 3. And also how to decide how many of each land to put into a Limited deck. Quite useful.

3. Love and Comedy. Oh I read this one this morning and it was hilarious.

The Results of Statistics.

1. 10% of all car thieves are left handed.
2. All Polar Bears are left handed.
3. So if your car was stolen, there's a 10% chance it was swiped by a Polar Bear.

1. 39% of all unemployed men wear glasses.
2. 80% of all employed men wear glasses.
3. Therfore, working damages your eyesight.

1. 4000 cans are opened every second.
2. 10 babies are born every second.
3. Ergo, every time you open a can, you stand a 1 in 400 chance of getting pregnant.